Great Blog Names

unsolicited advice about naming your blog

I have been reading a lot of new (to me) blogs lately and it has become clear to me that someone needs to offer a seminar on how to name a blog. There are a lot of blog names out there that are super self conscious, are trying too hard, sound ugly, make me think Elmo is in the room, are not wearing any underwear, induce a coma, are so cute I want to throw up*, or make me want to close my curtains to the world immediately.

Cut out the sugar, the cheese, and the dimples! Because I am ultimately a kind hearted person, I am not going to point my fingers to anyone who's blog names have violated my sensibilities. Instead I'm going to point out some great blog names (with links in case you actually want to visit them) with a brief explanation of why I think the name is great. Then I'm going to share with you what names I might have chosen for my blog if I hadn't named it after my company (which is now defunct) and if you want to use any of them you can, and you better do it before I trademark them or use them myself in an anonymous capacity.

Her Able Hands - This is one of my first favorite blogs and I was attracted to it, as I am so often, first by the name. I think it says a lot about who she is, isn't being too cute, and sounds strong. She's not writing much right now but maybe if everyone pressured her she's start feeding us her thoughts again.

Milk Money Or Not, Here I Come - It's original, smart, vulnerable, funny, and hopeful, all in the one name. It grabbed my attention and best of all, the writing is as good as the title. Schmutzie doesn't know it but we're probably going to be good friends some day.

Pam Kitty Morning - One of the reasons so many people love Pam's site is that it sounds cheerful. I couldn't really explain to you what the hell the name of her blog means but it emits the happy, sunny, bright, and sharply focused feeling of a good cup of coffee. I love that it is cute without the sugar. Like Pam herself, the genuine article.

No Appropriate Behavior - I don't remember where I found this blog but I laughed my ass off when I did. She is funny and true to her blog name. She's tough, she uses very foul language, she's crafty, and often unexpected. I think her blog title sums up what parenthood often feels like to me.

Mom O Matic - This blog name has a good ring to it. It's evocative of the reality of motherhood without any schmaltz. It's funny without trying to actually be more funny than it is, it's got a vintage feel to it which is in keeping with the writer's aesthetic, and it's acerbic. The writing is poignant and funny, often at the same time. I'm always jealous of her skill and if it weren't for her generosity of spirit I'd be tempted to put gum in her hair.

If I didn't include you don't assume it's because I don't like your blog name. I don't generally follow blogs whose names I find stupid. If I follow your blog the chances are pretty good I like the name of it. Words are potent to me and I'm careful which ones I keep in my life. This extends to the plants I buy too. I won't buy a plant called "Sexy Rexy"** because I would HATE to ever have to say it or think it. People are always quoting Shakespeare on this and I think they are very wrong to do so. What's in a name? Well, what's in your name? Would you feel as good about yourself if your name was "The Little Crapper" instead of Louise?

If I was to write another blog I would probably write an anonymous one so I could say ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING that's on my mind. Everyone would hate me, but I'd probably become famous for being hated, and I'd make lots of money and have no friends. However, I'm too busy with the ones I have now to do any more but you might enjoy some of the blog names I personally would love to use.

I haven't checked to see if any of these are already in use. It would be very amusing to find out that some of them are.

My Stick In Your Eye
Camel-toed Ho***
Wearing My Helmet To Bed (this one's my favorite!)
Retarded Muse
Botched Lobotomy
Shackin' Up With Jesus
Old Man's Crossing

My last recommendation is to remember that my opinion is only important if you think it's important. The best rule of thumb is to be true to yourself.

*This is saying a lot for someone who is emetaphobic.

**Sadly, this name HAS NOT been changed.

***I've never worn my pants tight enough to achieve a camel toe but I think it's funny to say and sometimes I think I'm trashy enough to live in a trailer. So why not?

Labels: blog names, blog writing