I'm Not Your Spit Monkey
This mini casserole looks really good, huh? You wish you were eating it...don't you? It's a recipe in progress. It didn't turn out as well as I hoped and so it will need to be worked on more before I can publish the recipe on Stitch and Boots. It's like a cross between a savory bread pudding and a quiche. It has sauteed summer squash in it. It was good....but not soft and luscious enough. It should have been more custardy. So pretty I want to cry though. I love my little baby casserole dishes and haven't used them nearly enough.
Today was the first day of school for Max and I just want to say:
THANK YOU PUBLIC SCHOOL! I LOVE YOU!
This reminds me of how emotional and defensive I get when people start talking about homeschooling. I will never homeschool unless I have no other choice. It isn't that I think it's a bad thing for everyone but more about how it would be awfully unhealthy for us to do it. This subject comes up again and again and again. Partly because I know a lot of people who homeschool.. The other part of it is because it seems to be a hot topic on Facebook and other social places. I'm going to say right now, to get it over with, that I don't believe all parents are appropriate candidates for being their childrens' formal educators. I am also going to say that I don't think everyone I know who homeschools their children should be doing it. I will never say specifically who I think should and shouldn't because it isn't my choice to make for anyone else.
There you go. Some people think I am doing a terrible disservice to my child by sending him to such an evil corrupt institution that public school apparently is. Before a homeschooling parent actually told me this was their opinion I had a much more positive opinion of their own different choice but I was shocked by the arrogance of another parent believing so fiercely that my choice is not just "not for them" but actually bad for everyone, including my own child. I really try, in my life, not to assume that just because something is appropriate for me that it must, therefore be appropriate for everyone. That kind of attitude is intolerant, arrogant, inflexible, and narrow minded.
Bottom line is that I believe all parents should maintain the right to educate their children in the manner they feel is going to be the best for their own children. I have definitely not observed any particularly stunning difference in intelligence and learning between the homeschooled children I know and those who go to public school though I have noticed some negative behavior trends amongst the homeschooled kids I know* that I see less evidence of in the public school kids, but I don't think it would be helpful or nice to elaborate.
So I have some work to do to get back to a place where I don't feel all defensive about my own choice. I really do think that homeschooling for some families is a better choice than any other and ultimately I want to be supportive of that choice. It will continue to take time and effort to return to my less negative point of view.
In a time when so many people are bashing public schools, I feel the need to say that for a kid like me, public school provided something that I desperately needed and wasn't getting at home: adults outside of my own home noticing me and giving me encouragement to pursue my talents and enlarge on them. I can honestly say that if my schooling had been left up to my parents I would be a drooling idiot in an insane asylum right now. And don't for a second think it's because they weren't smart enough- both my parents are well educated smart people. Unfortunately neither of them had the patience to be our sole educators. I needed a lot of patience and encouragement to thrive academically and my parents just wouldn't have been able to give me that.
I love public school. It would be a lot better if the government didn't keep cutting the funding to them. Whenever I can do so I vote to put more money in public schools because a free education is one of the best things this country has ever set up and there are a hell of a lot of excellent teachers out there who could be giving all of our kids incredible experiences in school but they are unfortunately getting saddled with too many students at a time and a lot of programs that kids thrive on have continually been cut down to almost nothing.
Yes, I am a socialist. I prefer, in general, not to align myself with any particular political party. Obviously I vehemently distance myself from any association from the Republican party. If it was ever honest and good it's been a very long time since it's become evil. Yep, I know, some of my relatives are Republicans. I was never particularly in love with the idea of communism but could never understand why so many people let it freak them out to the point of grabbing their guns and waiting for pinkos to invade their meager ramparts. Obviously I've always been politically liberal, but I am not a liberal extremist either. I think I believe in a government that is somewhere between Democratic and Socialist. I'm alright with that.
As for spit monkeys...WTF?! Yeah, this declaration ran through my head suddenly this early evening and I can't for the life of me figure out who the hell my brain was directing that comment to or what it means. "Spit monkey" was a surprising enough phrase to stop me midstride with a giant thought bubble above my head that reads "??!" Monkeys are rarely on my mind at all except when I think of my friend who admitted that she wasn't too sure about evolution because it freaked her the hell out to think about being related to monkeys which apparently are not her most favorite animal. I am completely comfortable being evolved from primordial slime. Or monkeys. Whatever. I have no ego about how my DNA developed over the course of mankind.
Is there any hot topic I've not touched on this evening?** Anything else I can do to piss people off? (My friend Lisa E. is convinced that I LIKE stirring up trouble- but I swear to you all that I just try to be comfortable with the inevitable because I'm zen like that. I try to embrace my inability to keep my mouth shut at any time. It has caused me a great deal of discomfort in my life and I am just trying to be alright with the fact that my verbal indiscretion is like the tides- completely compulsive and a force of nature.)
It was a beautiful day. Truly. The school year rhythm is much nicer on my nerves, my mental health, and my kid is infinitely better off when he's in school than when he's atrophying through the amorphous spineless summer days. We are a happier family already.
Big deep sigh of infinite relief.
Fall is just about here and I feel I've run a really dire marathon in which I lost both my legs and my hands are numb and I just crossed the finish line with a lot less of myself than I started off with in the race.
Relief.
(Can you feel it?)
(Oh, it's good!)
(Goodnight)
*To be fair, I don't think this is because of homeschooling as much as it is a difference in parenting methods which is another real hot topic for debate.
**Hasn't it been a long time since I've pissed anyone off? I mean, it's been kind of sweet and harmonious around here. That's not what you come for, is it? Oh dear, no, don't tell me. I don't think I can take the truth right now.
Today was the first day of school for Max and I just want to say:
THANK YOU PUBLIC SCHOOL! I LOVE YOU!
This reminds me of how emotional and defensive I get when people start talking about homeschooling. I will never homeschool unless I have no other choice. It isn't that I think it's a bad thing for everyone but more about how it would be awfully unhealthy for us to do it. This subject comes up again and again and again. Partly because I know a lot of people who homeschool.. The other part of it is because it seems to be a hot topic on Facebook and other social places. I'm going to say right now, to get it over with, that I don't believe all parents are appropriate candidates for being their childrens' formal educators. I am also going to say that I don't think everyone I know who homeschools their children should be doing it. I will never say specifically who I think should and shouldn't because it isn't my choice to make for anyone else.
There you go. Some people think I am doing a terrible disservice to my child by sending him to such an evil corrupt institution that public school apparently is. Before a homeschooling parent actually told me this was their opinion I had a much more positive opinion of their own different choice but I was shocked by the arrogance of another parent believing so fiercely that my choice is not just "not for them" but actually bad for everyone, including my own child. I really try, in my life, not to assume that just because something is appropriate for me that it must, therefore be appropriate for everyone. That kind of attitude is intolerant, arrogant, inflexible, and narrow minded.
Bottom line is that I believe all parents should maintain the right to educate their children in the manner they feel is going to be the best for their own children. I have definitely not observed any particularly stunning difference in intelligence and learning between the homeschooled children I know and those who go to public school though I have noticed some negative behavior trends amongst the homeschooled kids I know* that I see less evidence of in the public school kids, but I don't think it would be helpful or nice to elaborate.
So I have some work to do to get back to a place where I don't feel all defensive about my own choice. I really do think that homeschooling for some families is a better choice than any other and ultimately I want to be supportive of that choice. It will continue to take time and effort to return to my less negative point of view.
In a time when so many people are bashing public schools, I feel the need to say that for a kid like me, public school provided something that I desperately needed and wasn't getting at home: adults outside of my own home noticing me and giving me encouragement to pursue my talents and enlarge on them. I can honestly say that if my schooling had been left up to my parents I would be a drooling idiot in an insane asylum right now. And don't for a second think it's because they weren't smart enough- both my parents are well educated smart people. Unfortunately neither of them had the patience to be our sole educators. I needed a lot of patience and encouragement to thrive academically and my parents just wouldn't have been able to give me that.
I love public school. It would be a lot better if the government didn't keep cutting the funding to them. Whenever I can do so I vote to put more money in public schools because a free education is one of the best things this country has ever set up and there are a hell of a lot of excellent teachers out there who could be giving all of our kids incredible experiences in school but they are unfortunately getting saddled with too many students at a time and a lot of programs that kids thrive on have continually been cut down to almost nothing.
Yes, I am a socialist. I prefer, in general, not to align myself with any particular political party. Obviously I vehemently distance myself from any association from the Republican party. If it was ever honest and good it's been a very long time since it's become evil. Yep, I know, some of my relatives are Republicans. I was never particularly in love with the idea of communism but could never understand why so many people let it freak them out to the point of grabbing their guns and waiting for pinkos to invade their meager ramparts. Obviously I've always been politically liberal, but I am not a liberal extremist either. I think I believe in a government that is somewhere between Democratic and Socialist. I'm alright with that.
As for spit monkeys...WTF?! Yeah, this declaration ran through my head suddenly this early evening and I can't for the life of me figure out who the hell my brain was directing that comment to or what it means. "Spit monkey" was a surprising enough phrase to stop me midstride with a giant thought bubble above my head that reads "??!" Monkeys are rarely on my mind at all except when I think of my friend who admitted that she wasn't too sure about evolution because it freaked her the hell out to think about being related to monkeys which apparently are not her most favorite animal. I am completely comfortable being evolved from primordial slime. Or monkeys. Whatever. I have no ego about how my DNA developed over the course of mankind.
Is there any hot topic I've not touched on this evening?** Anything else I can do to piss people off? (My friend Lisa E. is convinced that I LIKE stirring up trouble- but I swear to you all that I just try to be comfortable with the inevitable because I'm zen like that. I try to embrace my inability to keep my mouth shut at any time. It has caused me a great deal of discomfort in my life and I am just trying to be alright with the fact that my verbal indiscretion is like the tides- completely compulsive and a force of nature.)
It was a beautiful day. Truly. The school year rhythm is much nicer on my nerves, my mental health, and my kid is infinitely better off when he's in school than when he's atrophying through the amorphous spineless summer days. We are a happier family already.
Big deep sigh of infinite relief.
Fall is just about here and I feel I've run a really dire marathon in which I lost both my legs and my hands are numb and I just crossed the finish line with a lot less of myself than I started off with in the race.
Relief.
(Can you feel it?)
(Oh, it's good!)
(Goodnight)
*To be fair, I don't think this is because of homeschooling as much as it is a difference in parenting methods which is another real hot topic for debate.
**Hasn't it been a long time since I've pissed anyone off? I mean, it's been kind of sweet and harmonious around here. That's not what you come for, is it? Oh dear, no, don't tell me. I don't think I can take the truth right now.
Comments (16)
Congratulations on your boy's first day back! Public school is awesome and those who talk badly about it are fueled by fear, like everything else. I am fairly certain that once you put on your witch hat you will be able to intercept my thoughts on home schooling :-)
And YAY for autumn! I am marvelously thrilled!
Posted by Kathy | September 8, 2009 9:54 PM
Posted on September 8, 2009 21:54
OK Kathy, I'm going to put my witch hat on right now...(Yeah, I think I gotcha there). But really, I can see that for some people it's a good choice so I'm going to work on getting back to my less judgmental place about it. Oh man- I love the fall!!!! So wonderful. It was cold this morning and it made me smile so loudly and I had to put a sweater on and that made me feel more human than I've felt for some time!
Posted by angelina | September 8, 2009 10:23 PM
Posted on September 8, 2009 22:23
If I homeschooled my children we'd end up with blood on the floor I'm sure!
While I don't agree with some of the things they are told at school and am worried about my daughter's spelling ( she's in her final year of primary school and they have only ever corrected a couple of spellings per item of work - I work on it at home but still she struggles) overall I think it is a good education.I'd rather they were in smaller classes as I don't see how 1 teacher can teach 36 children but till I find a big bag of money there's no other option.
Glad you and Max are settling into the pattern of school and autumn.
Posted by French Knots | September 9, 2009 4:25 AM
Posted on September 9, 2009 04:25
What I really want to know is where you got those freakin' adorable cups for the casserole?????????? Love them!!! (Nice to meet you off facebook! I need to add you to my feedreader. :)
Posted by dawn | September 9, 2009 7:26 AM
Posted on September 9, 2009 07:26
Jo- some people might say that Britain is giving better education than the US. I don't know, but I also don't like some of the things Max is being told at school, but we approach those issues at home. I am happy to have him exposed to ideas that aren't mine or Philip's.
Dawn- hey! You're Kelly's friend who I was being all rude and defensive with about homeschooling...you see, these conversations are good for me. I must say that you are a level headed lady and forgiving too. Thank you for coming by my blog! That FB conversation helped me see how deeply affected I was by one homeschooling parent's opinion and how I really need to find my way back to being supportive of other people's choices as well as feeling secure in my own. Since I didn't manage to keep all sharpness out of this post I'd say I have some way to go yet.
The casserole dishes...aren't they just too effing cute?! They are Le Creuset (not cast iron) and I requested them for my combined Christmas and birthday presents. I have four blue ones and four aqua ones. They hold 8 ounces. A little bigger than a ramekin.
Posted by angelina | September 9, 2009 7:54 AM
Posted on September 9, 2009 07:54
Hey Angelina,
I love the casserole dishes. I am with you on the public school love and I have been called a Socialist by people thinking they were insulting me many times. I am loving the weather and the change in seasons. -Tonia
Posted by Tonia | September 9, 2009 10:13 AM
Posted on September 9, 2009 10:13
One of the purposes of school is to socialize children (that means, to teach them the social skills to get along with others). Keeping them cloistered simply doesn't give them the experience or the self-discipline they need to interact with a variety of different kinds of people, both adults and their peers.
I trained to be a teacher although I became a writer instead. I always wanted to homeschool my son but because of unforeseen circumstances, he ended up being either in daycare or public school from the time he was quite young. He even went to a Japanese school for a year, where he never knew what was going on because he didn't speak Japanese and they, of course, didn't speak English. But he had it easy compared to the way we treat non-English speaking children in this country.
Yesterday, my son and I were talking about the parents who didn't want their children to hear Obama's address. I always wanted him to hear people I disagreed with because I was confident in his ability to distinguish truth from nonsense. People who are afraid to listen to an opposing viewpoint have no confidence in their own.
My sister homeschooled her kids until they were high school age and then they all went to the same public high school where her husband teaches. So I know given parents dedicated to educating their children homeschooling can work. But if kids never get to be involved with adults outside the home (coaches, music teachers, art teachers) then their lives will be quite narrow. I suspect these children will rebel when they finally get to interact with the whole big world.
When I think of those people shouting out that being educated is elitist homeschooling their kids...that's pretty scary. And if they can't teach an idea because the concept is "icky" or "gross", I guess they won't be churning out many biologists, doctors, or farmers.
Posted by mss @ Words Into Bytes | September 9, 2009 10:14 AM
Posted on September 9, 2009 10:14
Why in the world would anyone think homeschooled children are "cloistered"? My homeschooled children ARE out in the world, living. Even, gasp!, interacting with other children and adults. My teenagers have competed in the world finals of Odyssey of the Mind, lived on a college campus for a week, take dual-credit college classes, had summer jobs. They all have tae kwon do masters, gymnastics coaches, have had various sorts of teachers at co-op. They attend concerts, both classical and rock, take art classes, host parties...that's right, they actually have FRIENDS. Sometimes I wish their lives weren't as busy and social as they are, but they're happy and thriving and fun to be around.
Posted by Deb | September 9, 2009 10:52 AM
Posted on September 9, 2009 10:52
I think MSS has a very good point about the socializing. It isn't an issue for all homeschooled kids, yet I have to say that here in my town the homeschooled children are largely hanging out with other homeschooled children and that's still a very insular experience. Almost all of the homeschooled children I know go to some outside activity with an outside instructor (as you say Deb- art classes and Tae kwon do, etc) so obviously these kids aren't exactly cloistered. But I still see their exposure to their peers being pretty limited to people who live and believe mostly as they do. That isn't going to give a kid the skills to deal with the variety of people they will have to deal with when they leave home.
Posted by angelina | September 9, 2009 11:47 AM
Posted on September 9, 2009 11:47
Oh yea, homeschooling just wasn't for us, but we did a lot of learning at home. Not everyone is equipped for home schooling, temperment, education etc. Back to school were magical words to me.
Love your little casseroles. So pretty. Love you too, you know, in the non-lesbian way. xo
Posted by pam | September 9, 2009 12:13 PM
Posted on September 9, 2009 12:13
I didn't always like school but I really love public schools overall. It's free, social, multi cultural (some places) and you have to get along with people whether you like it or not. I have only recently met people who homeschool (for the wrong reasons I think) and it used to seem really Amish to me I guess. Sort of like a mom the other day who told my husband there was no way she could handle two little kids. To each his or her own right? Happy back to school to you.
Posted by amy | September 9, 2009 3:38 PM
Posted on September 9, 2009 15:38
Yeah, I don't understand why people get so heated up about the schooling debate. If you homeschool your kids - fine. If you send them to school - fine.
I agree - there are parents that shouldn't be homeschooling their kids (mostly due to the fact that they should remain parents and not educators). However, there are plenty who do great!
I for one will not be homeschooling my children. I don't have the patience for it - and I think my children need to learn how to adapt and respond to other adults in this world.
(ps - right now I have a baked zucchini casserole in the oven - similar to a eggplant parmesan but with zucchini. I hope it turns out as good as it sounds!)
Posted by Anonymous | September 9, 2009 5:13 PM
Posted on September 9, 2009 17:13
That was me, by the way - not anony
Posted by Karmyn R | September 9, 2009 5:14 PM
Posted on September 9, 2009 17:14
@Deb You are exactly the kind of parent, as is my own sister, who I admire. You get your children out doing things, taking lessons from other adults, participating in sports and arts, interacting with other children. I'm sure they get to meet all sorts of people from all different racial, cultural, and economic backgrounds and that they learn that not everyone sees the world in the same way. And that that is what makes the world so exciting and dynamic. They learn that they don't necessarily have to agree with or like everyone but they learn how to deal with that gracefully.
Who cloisters their children? The parents who actually do send their kids to public school in Tarrant County, TX but who wouldn't let their children go to school if President Obama's speech was going to be telecast. The children of the polygamist cult at the Yearning for Zion Ranch near El Dorado.
Maybe my comment was negatively colored from living in a state where these kinds of things happen all the time. I forgot that people elsewhere are generally more enlightened.
Posted by mss @ Words Into Bytes | September 9, 2009 7:52 PM
Posted on September 9, 2009 19:52
MSS, the funny thing is, I DO live in Texas! Not in Tarrant county, but I believe ours borders it.
Posted by Deb | September 10, 2009 1:04 PM
Posted on September 10, 2009 13:04
Hi! I just found your blog because of your adorable mini-casserole picture (I just bought several today myself and am blogging about them and will be linking to your site...)
I am glad I found your blog, too, because I was both home schooled and public schooled. I went on to be a TV reporter and anchor, then a professor, now I'm just chillin' as a Mom and Wife. I TOTALLY get what you are saying about home schooling and about public school. Both systems can be very bad fits for some people; both systems can be very good fits for some people. No one system is right for anyone (and some of us require a little of both!)
I'll be checking out your blog more now that I know about it! Keep up the good, honest work!
Candace
Posted by Candace | January 29, 2010 2:44 PM
Posted on January 29, 2010 14:44