Life, Accelerated

The kids are feeling it. Talk of birthdays, Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas is multiplying. In our family there is an inordinate amount of activity between now and January sixth because in addition to the four main holidays looming ahead, we have four birthdays and an anniversary. To occupy Max, Rex, and Elena, and to offer some pre-holiday fun, we had them decorate this year's candy baskets. Paper mache forms that they painted and glittered up. This one is Elena's. That's green blood you see on the jack-o-lantern's face.

These are smaller ones that I glittered up to sell in the store. These would not be appropriate for the over threes. Because once a kid turns three they really grasp that a bigger bucket means more candy and any parent who thinks their kid doesn't care about getting as much candy as possible is either in complete denial, or gave birth to a miracle child whose genes should be shared with the world more freely. Some kids may lose interest in eating all the candy a few days after getting it (I am silently scoffing at the idea) but all children get caught up in the candy-greed-heat-of-the-moment when they're out there on the hunt for it. And why not? We all came from hunter-gatherer stock originally.

Life is accelerating here. There is so much to do to be ready for the holidays, both personally and here at the shop. The aprons will be done today (because I've vowed to stay until they are finished) and then there's more Halloween items to finish. Then there's the opening to prepare for. The courtyard to decorate. And three thousand pieces of candy to buy to hand out to kids here at the store because we're participating in the safe downtown Halloween event. Thank god we can write off the candy for taxes. Can you even imagine what that mountain of mouth rotting goodness will look like?

I will be glittering a few bigger ones in the next few days. It will be too late to sell them on-line probably, but at least they will look pretty in the store. Aren't they festive? Next year I will have them ready early. Because everything here at Dustpan Alley will be running as smoothly and promptly as an Italian train during the fascist regime. I'm not saying we're fascists around here. I give you three guesses what we are around here...but keep those guesses to yourself because this is not an overtly political blog...stealthy maybe...but not overt.

Dang it. Now I've gone and tempted myself to enter into a political discussion because there's an interesting angle here. But the general wisdom is that if you want to sell things to people, you need to keep your personal opinions to yourself so as not to alienate potential or existant customers. Really, I do understand that concept and to some degree I think it's wise councel. However, the same people who would advise that also usually say that business isn't personal. That's complete wet B.S. If your business isn't personal then you're a liar and your business probably isn't very good. All the places I like to spend my money are places that you know are a personal expression of the person who owns it and/or runs it. It's that personal infusion that gives it a stamp of authenticity and charm. It's when you know what the business owner is about by how they run their company, how they treat their customers, and what they are trying to convince you to buy that you open up your pocketbook and let go of your hard earned money. Business is extremely personal.

So why can't I just haul off and tell you all exactly what my political opinions are? Why can't I tell you what my religious affiliations are? And what I think of everyone else's affiliations? I kind of do that here without the intent of stating my place in it all. It happens naturally. But I haven't really spilled myself completely because the truth is that I'm a damn coward and I want so desperately to succeed at what we're doing because I love what we're doing and I don't want to have to go work at JoAnne's Fabrics. I have the life I want now with the one thing missing: an income. I haven't decided yet how far I'm willing to go on my blog. My blog is not my business, it's a place where I can write about things that matter to me and where others can find my writing and see what they think (and share what they think too), but they are connected. They are linked. Unless I write annonymously, they will always be linked. So I have to think about what I say and who might be reading it and whether I care if those people will decide not to buy from me because of things I've said.

This is where you tell me to: "STOP NOW FOR GOD'S SAKE!"

I've decided that I will list here some of my beliefs and values that, if they offended anyone, I would not care if that person didn't shop with us:


I believe that every person on earth is born with the exact same potential to become a really worthy member of their society. I believe that legal equality is necessary and right between all the sexes and races. But I object fiercely to the suggestion that we are all the same. Men and women are very different. I believe they're both equally capable of achieving incredible things (often the same things) but there is no man I can look at and not see that he is different than me (and be thankful for it). And I believe that all races are equally capable of shaping and running our world, of becoming amazing people I would want my son to emulate. But we are not the same. Legally equal, but not the same. I believe it's the differences that make us interesting, that make us all unique, that give us all reason to explore and learn new things. I don't believe we're all born equal, but I do believe none of us is inherently superior to any one else.

(Plus, there's the fact that nature rewards us all for mixing up the genetic material with stronger healthier attributes, and in my humble opinion, mixing up the genetic material accross racial boundaries results in prettier people. So, mix it up people, cross state lines, cross cultural and racial divides...you're just helping to make a stronger more beautiful world.) (If you don't believe me then I suggest you do some comparing of pure bred animals with their mixed-breed counterparts. I know where you're going to find the weirdest physical features, the worse health issues, shorter life spans, and the worst behavior difficulties.)


I do not believe in oppressing people in other coutries. (In other words: I don't believe in Colonialism.)

I believe it's more important to be a kind, empathetic, and conscientous person than to be important. I'd love to make a million, or at least pay all my bills with what I make, but I'd rather live in poverty than become successful at the expense of people I love, the world I live in, and my soul. I know, sounds lofty, and pretty scary, but I've had to make hard decisions in my life and it always comes down to this.
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I am not religious. But I was brought up with a deep respect for faith, for spirituality, and the many faces of god in this world. (Yep, raised by Hippies.) I can even respect that many people see only one face of god. I am fascinated by religion and have a deep personal sense of spirituality. I freely make fun of religions that lend themselves to it, like all extremist religions. Like all the ones based on something totally random. The more earnest and humorless the religious group, the greater the urge to make fun of them. But here's the deal, nothing makes me lose respect for a person faster than when they try to convert me to their faith. I appear to be naive at times, I appear to be a malleable person because I am pretty accepting of people's personal beliefs and I like to listen to people, but I'm not convertable. Period end. I know what I believe and I've come by those beliefs through a lot more life experience than people generally give me credit for.


In our household we generally vote our conscience and do not tie ourselves to a particular party. We believe that voting your conscience is generally the most patriotic thing you can do. It is the single most American way to vote. That's just what we believe. Though we are going through some seriously compromised political times and have adjusted our beliefs temporarily to try and right some imbalances that can't be righted by voting for the green guy named Gustav who just wants to play his piccolo to the birds in the estuary. That's right, we take the current political situation seriously. That's all I need to say, right?


Beastiality is sick and I don't ever want to know, talk to, or sell anything to anyone who has participated in this awful fetish. So go away before I stuff your head for Thanksgiving dinner. I really believed this was a sick joke that people who like to shock other people tell at cocktail parties but I have heard from a fairly credible source that this is real. Tell me no more.


I take my role in the decline of our natural resources and my role in the use of this planet seriously. I'm not a zealot. I'm not sanctimonious, I hope. But I am adjusting my way of living step by step to make less of an impact on this world. Because I like living here. I like nature. There are things I have yet to change because I haven't found an acceptable alternative yet. So I am always looking for something else to change. Something else to save or recycle, or some less toxic way to clean and live life. We're not perfect here. We don't use solar power(yet). We still sometimes use paper towels. But we are a one car family, we ride bikes and walk as much as we can. We reuse everything that we can. We keep moving forward with our efforts. We don't want to get in anyone's face about it, but if we can inspire others to make changes, even small ones, and if our business can fascilitate some of those changes, then it will make us feel especially useful to all of you.


I laugh at myself all the time, and I often laugh at others too. But not unkindly. I thoroughly enjoy human foibles, my own and those of others. Sometimes I go too far, and I'm always sorry when I do, but sometimes you have to jump off the edge of what is known to be safe in order to uncover the best in yourself, in other people, and the world we live in. As a writer you must always be standing on this edge or you will never find the truth. Truth is unsafe. But it's what makes us feel most happy being ourselves. It's the only thing that propells us forward. It's what we spend a lot of time hiding from, and then seeking, in turns. It can be earth shattering and also sometimes incredibly comforting. In the end though, we should all be able to find humour in there too. We should all cultivate the ability to see ourselves how others might see us, and to enjoy that sometimes we might seem funny.


Mental Illness should no longer be a taboo subject. Nor should it be dismissed. Our lifestyles and the fact that we are increasingly preventing nature (and/or god) to do it's job with natural selection through the use of fertility drugs means that there are more and more of us being born with funny wiring in the brain. It's not a joke, it's not something the psychiatrists are making up to sell more drugs. There's quite a nasty tangle there between the over prescribing of psychiatric drugs and the real increasing need for them. Psychiatric drugs are not "happy pills" in the way that you might pop a qualude or some ectasy. It doesn't make you "happy", it makes you more NORMAL. For anyone who wants to ask the question "What's normal?", I advise you to search for the topic in my archives (I think it's in the August archives), and I'll tell you what I know about normal.

I believe that the other animals we share with this planet deserve our respect. Extinction is a narural part of this earth's cycle, but we should take care not to be the sole cause of other animals' extinction. Plus I believe that the animals we use for food, for their skin, their eggs, and their bones deserve to be kept in a healthy and caring environment prior to killing them in a humane way.


So what do ya think? You gonna still shop here? Well alright, now that we understand each other, come in and let me fix you up some coffee and I'll show you what you can use to clean your house that smells terrific and is super easy on the environment! Then you can laugh at me for writing such unashamed long posts on my blog. And as long as you don't have funnier hair than me, we can laugh at my hair together too.