Random thoughts, hot off the cerebral cortex

This is not so pretty. But I love Max in this picture. Plus I am running out of prescanned pictures to post and still haven't replaced my camera battery.

My mind is pretty distracted right now so I'm going to just write down what's in it, completely random:

Kaiser totally sucks and I would like to take them down when I take over the world. Which is going to happen any day now. They have already made my mom wait for months for replacement hip surgery because they wouldn't operate on her until she lost weight. Well, she lost some weight, and finally got the privilege to schedule her surgery and is being told she'll have to wait another four or five months. Assholes. She's in complete pain, can't work, and they just couldn't give a damn. So we started taking matters into our own hands. Hopefully we've come up with a solution that will get my mom out of their evil grip and into the hands of people who care about getting her fixed.*

F$%@ING KAISER.

Some celebrities seem much more stupid after you read their interviews than you originally thought they were. I don't doubt that if I was interviewed I would come off as some kind of thirties Cagney gangster who talks out of the side of her mouth and spits out memorable answers like "Duh, Uh, I will have to think about that. Hey sister, got any vodka?" Gwen Stephani, who didn't seem especially smart to me before, now seems remarkably more dumb now that I've read a couple of interviews with her. Another one is Mandy Moore. Who, by the way, I think is really cute even if she doesn't have a shred of talent. She sounded pretty empty in her recent interview in one of those fashion magazines I like to read so much.

Not only does Gwen Stephani sound really dippy, she's also way too braggy about her son Kingston. She claims that everyone falls in love with him instantly** and can't get enough of him, and seriously, after a whole day in the studio she just can't get enough of him. Oh, right, and he's as mellow as sloth. Uh huh. I never had the balls to say such things about my kid. And for the record Gwen: I would not fall in love with him because I would never get over the fact that I'd be forced to call him "Kingston".

I'm either getting sick or am having an allergy attack. It's any one's guess. I've felt like I was getting sick many times already in the past two months and miraculously have not ended up with a cold or flu. My throat is scratchy. But otherwise I feel fine.

Not having my camera in operating condition feels like having one of my eye balls missing.

Not that I actually know what that feels like. Is it automatically understood that when using similes, sometimes we're counting on our rich imagination to fill in the blanks?

If I die, I'm going to come back as a lawsuit. (That is what my brain sounds like to me all the time before I filter the really crazy things out for public airing.)

I finally built my mail order compost bins and put them out in the back yard. I then failed to empty my bulging compost pail. I've been wanting to start a proper compost pile for a very long time. It was sunny outside after an overcast morning. The sun was warm and pleasant the way only the winter sun can be. No scorch. It was such a nice few minutes. It made me long to work in the yard. Unfortunately I cannot get off track with other things on my list yet.

It's fortunate for me that I don't want to be a movie star.

As far as Mondays go, I can't complain.



*This plan does not involve guns of any kind.
**I am paraphrasing, not quoting.