Baby Lettuce: Cuter Than Kittens?

My lettuce patch has become choked with growth. I scattered the seeds and raked them in. I thought that would evenly distribute them and I couldn't have been more wrong. Those seeds stuck together like immigrants on a ship to a brand new mean life. The idea is to thin them for an early summer baby lettuce salad. Although I spent a good half hour carefully rearranging the density issues in my lettuce patch, it doesn't look any different than before.

Yet I removed enough for two big salads. Tender, sweet, delicate, fresh greens. That just makes me salivate. My mom has pointed out that now is the time to scatter seeds in the bare spots of my patch to stagger the harvest. Good point. That's the kind of thing I never get organized enough to do.

I can't leave the potato bed alone. My deep wisdomous inner voice says to let them all get bigger because the more you mess with the plants the greater the chance I will interrupt their growth by damaging them. One of the services my garden provides is something to pick at and on that isn't myself. That may sound strange, but I tend to pick at things: my skin, labels on bottles and jars, loose threads, the hems of my shirts, my blog.

In the garden I can channel this nervous need to worry at things by providing endless weeds to rip out or hack down, snails to find and feed to the hens, fussy staking jobs, an opportunity to check on it's progress every hour of the day without feeling like a total crazy person because things like lettuce tend to grow so much you really can see the progress. And of course: the chance to dig around for tasty tubers.

It was so good, and as usual, reaffirms my dedication to eating fresh food. Not everything was in season and that's something I keep trying to work on but sometimes I just can't resist what I find at the grocery store. One thing that will never be in season here in the Pacific North West is avocados. I could eat two of the good kind every single day. I love them that much. Not only would I never get tired of them, I am sometimes willing to pay in gold ingots to have them.

I have avoided eating beet greens for years because I have suspected that they would be tougher than chard. Although I love swiss chard, I don't enjoy a mouthful of iron-ladened greens that have a tough finish. The cheery fresh faced people at Oakhill Organic Farm back my mom up on the assertion that beet greens are delectable and I am a fool to avoid them when they are more tender than chard and sweet, and everything good....seriously, they waxed poetic just as much as my mom does who's been trying to convince me to eat them FOREVER.

Apparently, there's a good reason for their rhapsodies. Beet greens are so tender, so sweet, so fine...they almost melt in your mouth. Damn! I have been missing out on a really good thing all because I'm afraid of a mouthful of bitter tough greens. Even though I rarely eat green things for breakfast, I could really go for a plate of beet greens right now.

So, have any of you ever gotten a butt burn?

Yes...yes I did say BUTT BURN.

Remember way back when I was mentioning how I had possibly shown off my butt-crack to all my neighbors? You don't? (How lucky for you). Well, I was out in my garden for an hour yesterday removing weeds, thinning those greens, and getting my hands covered in dirt and trying to see if I could go fifteen seconds without a thought. It wasn't particularly sunny so I didn't think about putting sun screen on.

Besides, who puts sunscreen on their BUTT CRACK?

The answer: PEOPLE WHO GET BUTT BURNS IS WHO!

And that includes me, apparently. Because right above my ass is a swath of lobster red painfully burnt skin where my pants pulled down and my shirt inched up. Shit, as if I don't have enough to be embarrassed about already. How did I find out about this burn?

BECAUSE I HAD TO SCRATCH MY BUTT LIKE A MAN AND FELT A SEARING PAIN WHEN I DID.


I'm going to leave you with that dainty image. No need to thank me for making your day.


Peace Apron Update: As soon as I find out where to send the check, I'll be mailing out my first check to Moveon.org! It's only for $24.00 so far, but every bit counts and I want to thank all of you who have bought Peace Aprons and have made it possible for my poor sun-burnt ass to donate some money towards the peace efforts!